Lack of Sleep....

In the last several days ever since the night before the Autism Celebration which I slept at night last, hoping I will go lie down soon to fall asleep for even a few hours, but ever since the event I haven't slept at night much, was asleep maybe 2 - 3 nights before the event 2 - 3 hours that's it but since then I have been awake at night and not able to sleep and tonight I am feeling like I am ready to sleep at least a few hours but this sleep deprive is gotta stop because I am tired and my moods are really bad at times where I am snapping at my own parents and I think they know it is the lack of sleep. There is nothing Dr's can do for me at this point, I gotta just deal with it and try and make the best of it. 

Now, usually after a few days I end up going to bed and sleeping through the night and usually up at 4 or 430 am EST... LMAO, yes it is a very early morning but I get a lot. Now if I could get a a routine like 430 or 5 am wake ups and in bed by 930 pm that would be amazing to keep the routine going I would probably be in a happier place right now.  So what is my plan you may ask? Well I am planning on going to bed soon as this blog is posted and sleeping till at least 5 or 6 am EST then getting up getting my day started. Then hopefully I will be in bed at 930 pm later on and hopefully it fixes this screwed up sleep. Yes I am frustrated by this, yes I want this to all change and get my life back on track hopefully soon and I am going to start making changes in my life starting Monday with a 4 day treadmill and exercise routine and going to bed earlier and so on. I will do weekly updates on the blog like on Fridays how it is going.


Have a Great Night and/or Day!



Chris

Autism Celebration 2016

So last night I attended the Autism Celebration 2016, not my first, I've probably attended it 3 years in a row minus last year due to my commitment to my job that I got and yes I wanted to be there for it once again but couldn't but was there in spirit, I could of gone from work as a  guest not displaying my site but it is good to be back. When I arrived I was in very crummy mood and didn't really want to be there. But once I got things started and everyone visiting my booth. I started to open up to a lot of people, my past, why I left YouTube, even trying on my own from February to June which didn't work out very well. It was an suggestion made but if I've tried on my own and it didn't work out it didn't work out. 

Had a whole bunch of visits to my booth, some familiar faces and got to see my friends Mel and Lisa whom I've known for many years now and was great to see them both! Saw some familiar faces who have been to my booth in the past and always great to see them again! Connected with someone that knows a lot about website and can be an asset to my site in the future as well, so never know they might connect with me! Also connected with two current CICE students that is taking the program I was in for 2 years from 2010 - 2012 and was great to talk to current students. This told me promoting the program was an great idea and I am planning on continuing to promote the CICE Program again at next years Autism Celebration 2017! Also connected with someone who likes to play video games so a lot of ideas came up in my mind. Also it started to make me think what is more important to my website now & it makes me think maybe I should make my RETURN to Twitch.tv and maybe my friend Brew can help me get the OBS Studio down pat to no Lag and never know I could be streaming on Twitch again as of Nov 1st, 2016 the day after Halloween! So a lot of visitors to my booth have given me ideas even not writing anything into my suggestion box! Just talking to people is helping me realize I need to follow my newly found passions which is Blogging on my Site, Podcasting and Gaming! 3 things I highly enjoy in my life right now! I also got to reconnect to Lisa Binns whom I have known for 20 years, yes I have been a part of Kerrys Place for 20 years! I've known Lisa and Nicole the longest I believe out of all the Staff at KPAS. 

Finally I want to say thank-you to the Kerry's Place Staff and a very special thanks to Ann for helping me finalize the board. I will be back in 2017 for the next Autism Celebration and bigger and better then this year and more confident then I have been this year with this really not so good year, because 2017 will be my year and I will be over this really bad year! Below is a picture of where I have put my Thank You Card from the Kerrys Place Staff which is on my white board at the bottom so I can look at it everyday!

Have a Great Tuesday Everyone! 

Chris

P.S. Next event for me is Nov 8th, 2016: I will be at the Royal Winter Fair in Toronto.

Day Surgery & Post Procedure...

First of all I would of posted yesterday but I was overly tired from the long day I had but today I am taking the time to write one.  So yesterday I went to the hospital to get a scope done as most of you who follow me on Twitter know that this was coming up. I was nervous as heck for it. First I got my hospital wristband then off to a second waiting room to wait. Not long after actually I was taken to another room to get my hospital gown and housecoat on to prep me for the OR check all my information etc. We waited about 20 minutes, then headed off to the waiting area for the OR which we waiting about a hour and 10, maybe a hour and 15 minutes. Hard to remember but I got to walk into the OR. Of course I woke up they checked my vitals etc, I do remember waking up with oxygen mask on as my levels were low. I was moved to recovery room had some juice and got dressed and on my way home.

Today I slept in till 11 am this morning had my lunch then went on my computer for a while, went for a small walk then just resting more tonight. That was my recovery day pretty much low key. Still gotta catch up on Survivor Millenials vs GEN X podcast, watch Hells Kitchen and record the Everything About Reality TV Hells Kitchen Podcast. Ill do Survivior Tonight and Hells Kitchen tomorrow. Thank you again for your patience!

Chris

Northern Ontario Day Trip, Day Off!

I enjoyed a day off from the real world, aka working on my website & podcasts and boy it was a fun trip we went back to our old Camping spot which is Silent Lake Provincial Park and also went to Halliburton as well which was a very nice change of scenery. I was completely stress free until I got home and found out a friend decided to deceive and stab me right in the back which is putting a bunch more of stress on me the night before the procedure and making my heart rate gone up a bunch at this moment. But the day was nice leaving at 945 am and back around 6 pm EST so it was almost a 6 hour day and boy I am tired but waiting to go to bed at 1030 maybe 11 pm so I can have a late night snack so I wont be hungry as much tomorrow as I will not be eating till tomorrow afternoon after my procedure. So first stop was at the Country Style, our usual hangout when we use to go up to Silent for Camping which was nice, had a raisin bran muffin for a snack as I didn't eat anything in the morning which is normal for me usual... haha! So we went back to our old campsite # 127, good memories by the way, I have nothing but amazing memories at that campsite and will always remember the good times I had.

We took a trip around our old loop and the know what use to be the first come first serve loop which has electrical and yurts in there as well. Also the 3rd loop in the Granite Ridge Campgrounds. Then we went through Pincer Bay and down to the lake and canoe rental place as well! We headed down to the beach and took some pictures and went to the rock which is I guess you would say closer to the Day Beach. 

We headed to the rock and sat there for quite sometime and enjoyed it. Unfortunately we didn't bring out bathing suits and we wish we did, it was warm enough to swim in so we are bringing it for sure next time around. So after that we went to the day beach for a bit and seen the construction going on with their new cabins and showers being installed which look awesome! Same with the gatehouse being re built to the modern time era. 

Then we got on our way and headed to Halliburton and saw so amazing colors our way there, picture below: 

Now, when I arrived at Halliburton I went to Mckecks for a late lunch and I had a cheese burger with pickle and red onions and boy it was gooood! I put Mustard, Ketchup and Relish on and it tasted delicious! If you are in Haliburton Try it! tastes sooo good! Anyways this is a rather long and lengthy blog post but it was worth the post and to talk about my trip up north and I wanna thank you for reading this blog post and I will do another one tomorrow after the procedure at the hospital and wish me luck in the comments if you want to! 

Chris

Had an Awkward Moment Today On The Bus...

Today on my way home from the YMCA, I ran into my friends Terry and Angie and of course my arch nemesis and the person that destroyed my YouTube Channel and I had nothing to say to him, yet he sat there not even offering an apology for what he said to me which shows he don't care or want to apologize. At this point I do not even wanna hear an apology from him since he didn't try to even talk. His problem is he waits months before talking things out with me which harms and damages the friendship I had with him even more to a point I could not give a flying shit about him now... I've moved on. However let me tell you guys it was really awkward for me, wasted 13 years of a friendship with him. I mean if you spend this long being friends with someone and they treat you like trash, telling you to "Get Lost" and go back on their words and just be plain out rude. Also assault you, as you can figure out I was assaulted by him back in 2010 and finding it even more harder to forgive him, hes got no case for me to forgive and forget the crap he caused. 


But it was completely awkward with him being across from me and I couldn't even look at him, I just cannot find it in my heart to forgive him this time, there is no way in hell this time he will get in my good books now, I am clearly done with him now but to see him was the most awkward moment of today. I hate to open old wombs of a damaged friendship and it hurts to run into the person that really, really hurt me to a point I just wanna tell him off but I end up biting my tongue just because I was still fuming at that piece of crap. I am however glad I held back my feelings because that makes a mountain out of a mole which an old saying. What I am trying to say I need positive stuff in my life not the negative and I've been getting rid of the negative people or the people putting me down. Life is too short for negativity. That is why I held back my true feelings but yes I should release it somehow but I know this blog isn't the place for it but I am expressing my feelings how awkward and strange it was to see Eric and this is the first time in about 4 months I have seen him in person. I know what you guys will say is I gotta face him eventually and today seems to be that moment I need to face the music to the people who turned their backs on me. I think I am in the right direction.


Have a great night guys! 


Chris

Been Having Doubts

Been having a lot of doubts with ChrisBOnTheWeb.com and its not the podcasts I am doubting, I know, just the team behind me is kind of breaking up as it is now down to just Justin and I which is fine, but it is hurting me in the long process. I hope with these podcasts I will be able to find a co host maybe one of these days or live feeder to help with live feeds on Big Brother to give whats going on the BB Feeds so I wanna work on that too and maybe add bloggers as well and grow the website in a big way and get the viewership up! These are goals, but with me doubting the website it is kind of hard to move on with these goals but I gotta keep on pushing especially if I wanna add adsense to the website to earn some revenue within my website, I did way back from The Video Projects Team days which is a long time ago now since that happened. But I will try and continue with Justin aka Justina and try and get things back on track. Losing YouTube has been a big impact on me and I haven't been sleeping well the last while except for last night I finally was tired enough to sleep. I may have had 4 hours of sleep but I'll be fine and later sleeping better knowing I am fixing the website and the problems around with the site.

I shouldn't doubt I should believe in myself and believe in Justin and the words of wisdom he has given me in the last many weeks of my struggles with all the B.S. happening with my team and with me starting to not believe in my team but I got still believe because if I don't then my website will back downhill and it will be over for chrisbontheweb.com and no way of rebuilding it. Yes Larry, Sarah and Eric who's the big name screwed me over but I gotta remember Justin hasn't yet and I don't think he will quit.


Have a great day everyone! 


Chris


P.S. Yes I am like Doubting Thomas in the bible after the Resurrection of Christ.

Do I Miss YouTube?

It has now been almost been 3 months since my departure from YouTube long before their "Term of Service" changes. Only reason I did leave was because of the crap I was enduring with my team and the way my team turned their back on me and leaving me to do everything on my own, so to the question in the title of this blog "Do I Miss YouTube?" the answer is "NO" I do not miss the drama from my team and having to deal with quitters quitting on me in the middle of a web series that was doing so well as it was returning back to the normal amount of views it use to get so everything was going great up to the start of Season 6 when I started to feel fed up of the series but I didn't let it bother me and I continued with the season but when Season 6 ended that is when "All hell broke loose"  Once Larry quit, then Eric not once but twice, that was enough for me to go over the edge and when I fired a staff member, I knew that was the end of my YouTube Career and I do not miss all the drama or the drama on YouTube. The community has become with hateful people and also the "drama channels" out there, but it sounds like as being an outsider looking in that things are getting better. However the changes of you cannot swear in a video if you Monetize your videos so I left at a good time and 10 + years on the platform and in the industry is a very, very long time and like the saying goes, "time to move on" or "life goes on." In the long run now I am very, very happy I have moved on and recording Reality TV Podcasts, which is brought from YouTube and continued. Also the blogging and hopefully by November Twitch Stream in the near future as well. 


Until the next blog, have a great evening everyone,



Chris