Showing posts with label completely stressed out. Show all posts
Showing posts with label completely stressed out. Show all posts

Wednesday, May 17, 2023

I Admit I've Been Stressed and Depressed...

            As you saw yesterday, I was a bit of stressed but also my depression has been bad since my grandma passed things have been all over the place and the fact I am now opening up a little over 2 months later, I couldn't hide the truth why sometimes, I have been either quiet or going off about stuff and to be honest I should of said something sooner not hide it by having my Community Manager stalling things for me and just telling you guys I needed space right now as I am doing personal things right now. That is the personal things going on with me right now. It will take some time for me to heal but I just need this drama to end as I cannot always be around, there is content to do and what not. 

               Not only that, trying to keep up with Power Rangers Collab hasn't been the best something always came up where I am unable to work on it. I have been trying and I want to get it done and finished by the end of July and why the schedule has been shifted about numerous times but we're getting there. As you know the anniversaries came first before anything else then June and so forth. Anyways that is what has been going on with me and the truth is out and for now on there will be an open door policy moving forward. I will talk to you all tomorrow.


Chris

Monday, November 28, 2022

I Was Stressed Out!

               I was stressed out as the title says. For once it's nothing to do with ChrisBOnTheWeb for once. It's more IRL stuff going on here in Ontario Canada to a point, I am stressed out from arguing, stressed out from worrying about my friends. This weekend I just snapped and ended up blowing off a phone call with a friend and it hasn't happened like this in about a month now where I just didn't wanna talk to anyone. Maybe right now I just need my space to be on my own. I am not going anywhere as of right now and I probably fear that Larry will wanna get together for a hangout which as you know production for Dino Charge is on hold till January and at some point I will get to it and the way I figured it out in my head I should have it done by Christmas.

              That is besides the point that I wanna make, the point is for once it isn't about ChrisBOnTheWeb, it's just personal stuff going on that has been worrying and stressing out right now. Don't get me wrong, I am excited for 2023 and the next season of Entertainment Man Podcast, Power Rangers Collab wrapping up it's last full year of seasons before we get into one offs that we wanna do and of course The CBOTW Show as well. Friday, Saturday and Sunday, I just didn't do anything, I fiddled with the website and played video games. However, today I am back to editing grind and getting all the seasons done by end of this weekend so I can type and maybe we could possibly still record. Anyways that is my post, I will talk to you all tomorrow!


Chris

Wednesday, October 26, 2022

Dealing With Stress

             Recently I have struggled with depression and stress and part of the depression is the stress I am going through with ChrisBOnTheWeb. I try to get the collab done in time for the 3rd but yet to really bury myself into the notes. I just did not have the time, was always busy with the interviews and one of the reasons I took some time off as I felt like I wasn't paying attention enough to the collab. Other reason was I needed some time to do more from the heart episodes but don't worry, I will be back to those by November 6th with scheduling them. I will be by then finished with the collab. I think it is more that I am not using very good time management skills right now and that is something I need to work on is my time management skills to ensure things do get done even if I was to do half on one the other half on another. 

            I have been struggling and been more in my moods lately and hasn't let up. Even on my meds for Autism it doesn't seem to have helped with my moods. I at times I end up just not functioning fully where I just wanna play video games and not work and that hasn't helped whatsoever with getting work. Been trying to motivate myself so I can get the work done and Saturday and Sunday showed it. Saturday I really tried up to late in the day I started to record and get things out. Sunday I charged hard at it and got 2 of the 3 podcasts done. Somewhere inside me  I really was trying my hardest to not let the stress and mental health get in my way. I have been fighting this for a while but not giving up. I will get all this content done and I will catch up. I know I can, just need to give some positive reinforcement with myself and I will get myself caught up cause I know I can do it. Anyways that is the post for today and I will talk to you all tomorrow.


Chris

Monday, April 18, 2022

Let's Talk Stress

              I admit the stress levels have been up the past month now and I haven't been able to deal with stress. Last week was a big example of me not being able to handle it as you know I was restricted from Facebook twice which I didn't do anything nor broke any rules nor Larry, Chloe or Amy wouldn't report me so someone decided to false report me and get me in trouble with the platform. I give too many chances to be honest to certain people and honestly I need to stop giving so many chances that is my problem. I should implement with CBOTW a 3 strike system, once your on strike 3 your gone.  I've been named called, accused and screwed over for podcasts. It really has  affected me and there is a system to how you can get your podcast into my network. Right now it's just friends I am allowing cause of the events in the last 2 years. 

              This is me starting in a fresh start. Once I block, I do not unblock. Not going to let anyone bring ChrisBOnTheWeb down this year. This website has done extremely well and has shown a lot of promise and progress. Especially with Amy's podcast now back on video once again we keep on growing this thing from here on out. I need to learn to deal with my stress levels and know my limit for working on things and taking that break when I need to take a break from things for an hour or so. I stress very easily and last Monday was a proof of it. I know with the Facebook drama I didn't deal with it well as In was in one of my moods the rest of the afternoon. When I got home a week ago, I ate dinner then was in bed afterwards and not up till nearly 3 am the next morning. Even the next morning I was emotionally and physically tired from the previous day and just did my own thing during the day. Wasn't upstairs much during the day and stayed down in my studio most of the day. Anyways that is my post, I will talk to you all tomorrow have a great rest of your day!


Chris

Tuesday, March 16, 2021

I Am On A Sabbatical As Owner of ChrisBOnTheWeb

                  As the title says I am taking a break or Sabbatical from running the day to day Operations which now now has been handed over to Charlotte for the day to day operations of the website and team. Couple of reasons for that is 1) I'm stressed 24-7 and need to try and now destress and I am going to if crap stops happening over this way. 2) My grandma has been not well since getting the vaccine for this virus as Jasmine would say, the Backstreet Reunion Tour (LOL.) 3) Now that Entertainment Man Podcast is gone, I have been depressed and dealing with that too. 4) Getting over some drama and always seems to be more added to the list to be honest. 5) The amount of hate, disrespect and being blocked for no apparent reason. Those are my reasons behind why I have taken myself away from CBOTW and why I am not as involved with the team at this time. I know I have been accused of so many different things recently which is beyond what I can believe and it is hard honestly to take this crap from people.

                   However I will still be active on the blog Tuesdays - Fridays on our normal blogging days, I'll be active on Twitter and Instagram posting up stuff but as for the decisions I will not be involved with for the time being while I deal with and get my mental health better then it has been with recently which is the upmost importance to me. Also the Podcasts you will hear my voice but I need to be upfront and honest with all that is happening with my Grandma not doing well, Jasmine will be taking over this week at the most, Thursday at least, I may pop back on Saturday, we'll see how that is goes but more then likely Jasmine will do both this week while I deal with all this and I know they will be happy to take over as long as I need and this is why I have an amazing team, we back each other up either way. When will I return back to ChrisBOnTheWeb? I couldn't honestly tell you guys at this point, now is definitely not the time to make that decision at this moment. I am taking my time with the decision to return and I hope it's soon to be honest and I may wait till my Facebook Ban is over but we will. I just wanted to be more open why I am taking time away and not hide the real truth behind why I haven't said anything and honest reason is I had posts already scheduled for last week and why I have decided to push it to today.


Chris

Wednesday, March 3, 2021

I Cannot Be Careless With Forgetting To Blog.....

             I know I am suppose to blog on a daily basis but I was once again very careless with not blogging. Yes I did it again! I just do not know why I didn't think of this last night when I was on very late last night that I should of done a post and to be honest, I didn't really have anything planned. The Schedule this week on the whiteboard in the studio consisted of topics written on there Monday and yesterday and today's and tomorrow's blanked completely with no real topic and my weight loss well that's fluctuated so much I just do not think I can really give you guys an update on that right now. Maybe next week I can give you guys a definite update on my weight loss but with my weight either going up and down or staying put as I have tried so hard to get it below 230 before end of this week but that may not be happening at this point but the update is all up in the air for this week. Only 2 days away from that and we will see what I wanna do. 


            I can say that this week is totally up in the air right now. This is a very random week with posts at this point. I am just unable to keep up with it really, with 3 podcasts on the go trying to run  the maybe Lounge or have Charlotte do that to blogging and watching the show, I do not have enough hours in a damn day to keep up with everything honestly. So much going on but I have an announcement that I am going to be discussing this with my co-host next week that we will put off any recording till June and into July and it will be just prep work at this point. As you know today I was suppose to record this weekend's Entertainment Man Podcast but I have to do that tomorrow when I get up and get editing it as I am podcasting a ton during the weekend but if I am up tonight late I may take a whack at recording today. This is my boring post for today and sorry it wasn't anymore exciting then you expected but tomorrow Charlotte is going to be taking over the blog tomorrow as there is something she wants to talk to you about with the return of our lounge, rules etc. I will talk to you all Friday!



Chris

Thursday, October 10, 2019

Everything About Reality TV Podcast Will Be 3 Episodes Short of 250!

               Originally was going to do a Throwback Thursday but I went against the idea as I feel like it was too soon to actually do this as I was only involved with PRCB for nearly 3 months and I wanna wait till I hit the 1 year mark at least. Anyways I was doing the math yesterday and I realize that I am going to be 3 episodes short of 250 and I feel like it's all my fault honestly. What do I mean? If I ended up continuing on with Big Brother 21, I more then likely would of had the 250 so easily, probably end up but a little over 250 by the end of the year. However that wasn't the case this time around, I ended up stopping those recaps towards the end of the season which I lost 2 subs because of it but hope I end up gaining that back eventually. There was a lot of flaws and issues I had this summer which has really made me think about the future of the podcast and that is one of the reasons why we will be 3 short but if it wasn't for what I did screwing things up like I have been then probably would of gotten to that 250 right on. I really messed up my numbers and hurting the podcast and honestly I am starting to question myself with this podcast to how much longer it will last if I continue with the route the podcast is going or I end up walking away and doing other projects that I have going on now.  Now I know I signed a silly contract agreeing I would continue on till Fall 2020 then it would be obviously up for renewal if I want to continue and I know that is like an guaranteed additional year for the podcast  but we will definitely will have to wait and see what the plan is for 2020 - 2021 when the time is right. I need to start focusing on fixing whatever the issues are and I know there are a few that occurred during the summer and they are:

1)  Staying on track and honestly I haven't been staying on track but honestly it has become better this season then the last season to be honest and things are starting to look up for the podcast but I did lose subscribers because of this and not staying on a schedule. 

2) Fixing the quality of the microphone which is already starting to sound a ton better then it has been in the last while. I am working on and it has indeed has gotten a ton better then it has been and I wanna remain professional with the podcasts I am involved with.

3) Not making the mistake to returning to YouTube was another mistake I made and you know the song and dance to that honestly. That wasted a ton of my time too as well hence the copyright claim crap I should of just continued on with Audio ONLY which has been blowing up like crazy in numbers.


              So there is tons of reasons why we ran 3 episodes short but do not worry come January 2020 I will be doing some off season podcasts so that will be the time to catch up on the numbers to ensure we will be ready for the winter season with Survivor 40, Big Brother Canada and Amazing Race which we do not know when that is coming out so it is on the wait list for now and we will see what is going to happen. 



Chris